First Sunday after Epiphany
The feast of the Holy Family is a recent addition to the Church’s liturgy. The reason is obvious. It wasn’t until modern times that the human family, as instituted by God and sanctified by Christ, came under virulent attack. What are the aspects of this attack? In brief: the father has been emasculated; the mother has been emancipated; and the child has been eliminated.
To understand how disastrous this is, we must look at the family in God’s plan.
The father is the head of the family. His responsibility is to watch over, protect and guide his wife and children. He must be a model of wisdom, prudence, justice, courage and moderation. He must sacrifice himself every day to make sure that bodies are clothed and fed. He spends most of his time outside the home for, in most cases, there is no other option for him to find work. This also makes him the “face” of the family, the one who deals with issues with other families.
The mother is the heart of the home. Just as the heart is the stable organ of the body that pumps blood to the rest and keeps it in unity, the wife and mother give life to the rest of the family and is its living and loving centre. She conceives children, gives birth to them, nourishes them, rears them, looking after all their needs. She is the life of the home in which she reigns as queen. She is responsible for the order in the home. Her constant preoccupation with her children makes her vulnerable, which is why the protection and support of her husband are vital to the family.
The child is the fruit of the love of his parents. It is because his parents love each other that he comes into existence. He is also the weakest link in the chain, the most fragile, the one who is utterly dependent upon his progenitors for everything. No animal is born with the same degree of frailty as a baby human. All this is willed by the Creator, so as to give us to understand the solicitude He has for us and to furnish us with the opportunity to practice charity for one another. The love and care that parents give to their children will one day be given back when they grow old and are cared for by their children. So it is that in God’s plan, all things are ordered wisely and prudently.
The modern attack on the family has left no part of the family undisturbed. The weakest link is under attack through both contraception (which prevents a new life from coming into existence) and abortion (which destroys a life already conceived). Both practices are abominable because they oppose God’s plan of propagating the human race and making more saints for Heaven. But the Enemy has not forgotten those that live. He seeks to corrupt them from the youngest age by exposing them to vice and by poisoning their minds with evil ideologies, sometimes leading them even to mutilate their own God-given bodies.
The next weak link, the wife, has been under attack mainly through efforts to take her out of the home. Since she is the living heart of the home, it is easy to understand how devastating it is for her to be removed from it. It is already sad and exceedingly difficult when a single mother has to work to provide for herself and her children, but when the world persuades a woman with a husband that she must have her own career outside the home and that this is more important than her children, then we have a real disaster in the making. There are a number of reasons for this. The first is that being a mother is a full time job, and it is the most important job on the planet. The hand that rocks the cradle rules the world. Don’t ever forget it and don’t ever let anyone indoctrinate you otherwise. A second reason is that, although there are some very gifted women who are capable of competing with men and not losing thereby the charm and glory of their femininity, this is by no means common. Although there may be notable exceptions to this, more often than not the pursuit of a career at the expense of her primary duties sends a woman on a wild goose chase that prevents her from being a good mother and does not allow her to excel at anything else. Happy are those who come to their senses early enough and return to the home where there is a royal throne prepared for her, and in most cases, a husband delighted to crown her with his love and respect.
The man too is under attack. His virility is destroyed when the fruit of his loins is prevented through contraception or eliminated through abortion, or when it is depraved and wasted through pornography, which is a form of adultery. He is emasculated when journalists harp on what they call “toxic masculinity” as if it were a crime for him to be a man. For his sanity and health, it is important that he recover his maleness, his strength and his place as head of the home. He must take his responsibilities and be a leader. This is God’s plan. It works but is by no means means easy.
When all this is in place, we are off to a good start, but the job is not done. Family prayer is a key to unity and charity. The family that prays together stays together. This prayer must be shared by all, under the leadership of the father. Too many men wrongly think they should leave that part to their wives, but the man as head of the family must lead the prayer and give the example. When the father, mother and children fulfil their roles in their particular place, a family is at peace, order reigns and souls are saved.
A few final words for parents.
Be open to all the life that God wants to give you. There is no population crisis. We have not yet fulfilled God’s command to fill the earth. God loves humanity. Satan is the murderer who seeks by all means to destroy God’s masterpiece. If God does not give you the children you so long for, carry that cross with love and make yourselves useful in other ways to those who need you. In this way, you will truly be a mother and father to many.
While you must provide for your children’s needs, you must also teach them how to make do with little, how not to have everything they would like and to learn how to go without things. Do not pamper them. If your children are to be successful in life and overcome all the obstacles that lie in the way to doing that, they must learn how to renounce themselves in favour of others. If you are good parents, your children will want to become good parents in turn. A good parent is a self-sacrificing parent, just as a self-serving parent is a bad parent.
Last, but no means least, while you give to your children the model of beautiful family life and instil in them what it means to be a father and mother, you must take care to open their minds and hearts to the beauty of a religious or priestly vocation. God is calling souls to a life of poverty, chastity and obedience, but many do not hear the call because they have not been prepared for it. When at all possible, take them to where they can see real religious who live their consecrated life with joy and peace. Find a good priest to whom they can look up and whom they will want to emulate. And if God favours you by calling one of your sons or daughters to serve Him alone in a life of total consecration, do not be sad, but rather rejoice that the Lord of glory has cast His eyes upon your very own progeny. No greater grace could He give you.
